Don’t get me wrong, it’s not like I haven’t thought about what it would be like if I was married to someone like Noah, (Ryan Gosling), in The Notebook. My husband isn’t the type to buy me flowers every evening or serenade to wake me up for the full course meal he made. He doesn’t make public announcements of his undying love for me and tell others that “I had him at hello.”
His versions of romantic gestures include biting my arm, (playfully!), while I’m cooking or getting me our wedding flowers for occasions like my birthday. Sometimes, out of the blue, he even picks up a nice energy stone necklace from a store he knows I’d like.
He isn’t the type to plan a whole weekend of surprises for me, (he says I’m better at planning), and he likes to just go for the ride. But if he has to plan something, (like when he proposed to me or my 30th birthday party), he goes all out and doesn’t hold his heart back with anything.
He doesn’t tell me I look beautiful when I want to hear it at times, but when I’m least expecting it, in the most random moment, he shows me. He hugs me and says I look nice. He means it with his eyes.
And while he rarely, ok never, touches the dishes…actually, there’s no follow-up with this one. He never does them and yes, that can get annoying.
But we live in this world, especially on social media, where it seems like women need to tell others how amazing their spouses are. I sometimes scroll down my Facebook news feed, and see the many elaborate date nights hubbies’ planned for friends, the special gifts boyfriends bought their girls and while I am happy for them, it makes me wonder.
Are we breeding a culture where what we get and do for another is rewarded by public “likes”?
Is love turning into a “likes” contest?